There are certain things that just shouldn’t be done via text messages. For instance, it’s probably best to quit your job in person rather than through text messaging, no matter how tempting it is to never see your boss again. And you wouldn’t necessarily want to let someone know their loved one had died via text message. No matter how much time would be saved by sending a mass text, there are just some things that require an actual phone call. This 11-year-old found out the hard way that break up texts are also a “no-no” because older sisters might just see your said break up text and post it online for the world to see. However, if you are going to break up via text message you should take notes from this 11-year-old because what she said is absolutely hilarious. It’s hands-down the best breakup I’ve ever heard about or read.
Poor Joey didn’t have a chance when she started the conversation with the dreaded “We need to talk”. Four small words that can make anyone’s heart drop into their stomach and reflect on all the things that you have done that the other person might have found out about. He was smart and kept his response very simple. Let’s ignore the fact that her grammar is atrocious, we’ll attribute that to this girl only being 11 years old, and focus on the accusation part of this breakup. She goes straight into telling him what she heard without asking if it was true or trying to catch him in a lie (bravo for that)! Then she reminds him that she has already given him 2 previous chances to be a good boyfriend. Hopefully she learned “once a cheater, always a cheater” from this dramatic experience in her life.
I like that Joey didn’t try to deny the accusation, but he does try to downplay it and she wasn’t having any of that nonsense! He has been banned from speaking with her through all of middle school, then like any scorned woman she tried to hit him where it hurt by denying she had ever loved him. However that lie missed its mark because he has proof of her love. Nobody buys someone else Starbucks if there aren’t some serious feelings involved.
He obviously trumped her there so she had to pull out the big guns and totally burn him with her next line referring to the elevator! Total Diss! And she knew it, and called it. She definitely won! Poor Joey! And now everyone can see his humiliation because of his ex-girlfriend’s older sister’s snooping and sharing their deeply personal conversation online! He gets his poor heart ripped out over and over again every time he checks his Facebook!
This is one conversation I am grateful has been documented via text message and shared online for us all to enjoy. We can all take some notes on how breakups should be done from this thrice cheated 11-year-old girl! And we should also learn from her mistakes and break up in person so there isn’t a written record of everything that was said so it can’t be posted online!